The Perks, Perils, and Peculiarities of Paradise

Life here in Hawaii is certainly unique - then again, every place has its own quirks and uniqueness. But, when one lives on a little island in the middle of the Pacific...

We are still in the little condo with the view of the loading dock, but we hope to be out of here fairly soon. This is a very good thing since the large fluorescent lights in the bathroom are going out, the ancient microwave is very indecisive about actually heating anything, the couch has teeeeeny ants that love to bite only me, the utensil drawer in the kitchen is coming off it's runner, and the refrigerator is dead. To make things more interesting, the place is in foreclosure. I know this because while I was drying off after a nice shower (Praise God, that still works!), there came a knock-knock-knockin' at my door. More precisely, there came a pound-pound-poundin'. This guy has a bad job, and he is as polite as he can manage, but he wouldn't go away until I threw on some stuff and got the notice from him - a copy of the one he had attached to the door. This begs the question: why couldn't I just get the one from the door?!?!?!!? Anyway, I guess this place is in limbo, meaning there is no one to call about things falling apart, so we just live in this Charlie Brown of a condo until the Lord moves us on. Usually, I'm a total sucker for C.B. and all underdogs, but I'm ready to gooooo.

I still have to really think about what month it is, let alone what season. So, I can tell by our calendar with our beautiful grandchildren on it that the month is March. I can tell by the number of tourists slowing down on our highways, for seemingly no reason, that it is whale season. Mauians love their whales, but tourists create their own type of road hazard when they see one of these guys spout off (ahahaha!! Get it!?!? SPOUT off!?!??! I crack myself up....). Anyway, the population on the island must double this time of year, so we're used to the increase of traffic, but, as a firefighter friend puts it: "you have all kinds of different driving cultures, driving down a two-lane highway at 60 miles-an-hour looking at whales and texting." Perhaps he exaggerates. But only slightly. There is even a sign I have seen that states, "Whale watching is NOT an emergency - KEEP DRIVING!" But you can hardly blame them. This year there has been what seems like a larger number than usual, and we are all blessed for it! There is no describing how amazing these animals are. I love how all residents of Hawaii - native Hawaiians, long-time residents, recent transplants - love their whales. But ya just gotta be careful to not get hurt while admiring them...

One of the most astonishing things about having honeymooning and birthing humpbacks in the neighborhood is the experience of hearing them sing underwater. It is a beautiful, haunting chorus sung by only the males, and it sounds a little like every planet on the original "Star Trek". Really! I promise!! This winter has been so busy that we haven't had the opportunity to go to our favorite spots where the whales can be heard quite clearly. One of them is Black Rock on Ka'anapali Beach, and the other is what is commonly referred to as Airport Beach, on Ka'anapali's north shore. Valentine's Day fell on a Monday, which is Don's day off, so the day was ours. We opted to have a day long posh picnic and purchased smoked ahi spread, brie, smoked gouda, sardines, and other treats to enjoy at two of our favorite beaches - starting at Airport Beach then going to Olowalu. Sounded sweet and romantic. ahhhh.... We got to Airport for our first course and our first trip into the water. This place has an awesome reef when the conditions are optimum. Unfortunately, conditions were not optimum. They were pretty much all kicked up and poopy. This place is also known for its many rocks that line the beach, leaving only a few places for safe entry and exit. It is also important to be able to see said rocks and safe places before you enter said water and waves. The surf wasn't too big - but then again, it wasn't too little, either. We assured ourselves that we knew where the sandy entrance was, grabbed our gear, and entered between sets. or so we thought. Don entered without much trouble and I followed along, even though it was so kicked up we literally couldn't see our own feet. I looked out and just beyond Don was a swell that I knew would be the one to carry me on out. Not so much. I saw it begin cresting just over my hubby's head, had enough time to yell "WAVE!", then it smacked Don as it sucked the water out from underneath me, then rocked me back up and around, knocking me into one of the invisible rocks. Oh, yes. Did I mention that these are lava rocks?!!? And that these lava rocks are very, very sharp?!?!?! In a split second, I knew I was in trouble - and shouted such to my husband who was surfacing after being clobberd by the wave. So, less than sixty seconds after entering the water, we exited. At first glance, I thought I had simply scraped my leg...and then the red stuff started a-flowin'. Don walked with me over to the shower where there was a nice man who filled the shoe part of his fin and poured it on my long boo-boo. He was very kind and sympathetic - until he found out that we're local and should definitely know better. Don had come back with a towel by then and was doing his best to stem the tide, but all I could see was that it was ONE OF MY BEST TOWELS THAT WE'VE HAD FOREVER!! My priorities are just fine, thank you. Bottom line is that I had several parallel cuts, with one kind of serious one. They were about nine inches long, but even the worst was only deep enough to be gross. Having raised three sons and being a perpetual klutz, I know a ton about taking care of such boo-boos. A few hours later, I had washed it with betadine, added some neosporin, then we got it as closed as possible with wound closure tape, topped it with gauze, finally wrapping the entire thing with the stick-to-itself-bandage tape. Good stuff. Yes, we still had our romantic picnic...on the couch in the living room. Almost three weeks later, and I still have not been in the water (not wise to go in until this is totally healed), I still have not heard the whales singing, and I'm getting pretty cranky. All land and no sea makes Denise an unhappy wahine...

Not all perils are so dramatic. In fact, I have seen some that are pretty fun. Case in point: a couple of weeks ago we attended a birthday party for one of the kids at church. One of the cool things about living here is that when a kid has a birthday, EVERYONE is invited for the celebration! This was a fun bbq at one of the best family beaches on Maui, DT Fleming beach. This is not a beach for snorkeling, except at the extreme north or south of this long crescent. Mostly it's surfing and boogie boarding. On this particular day, it was Presidents Day, so all the kids were out. The birthday boy and his buddies were joined by about a million other kids on their boogie boards. Looking out at multi-colored boards with multi-colored boys wearing multi-colored board shorts it looked like someone had tossed a bag of skittles out on the waves. What was more fun, though, was watching all these kids ride the waves. Instead of being competitive over waves, these guys purposely merged together until there was about a 27-board-and-boy-pile-up in the surf. Instead of looking cranky and ready to rumble, the happy demolition derby boarders laughed, then paddled out to do it again. Too fun!

Among the perks that go along with living in a small town like Lahaina is the access and involvement among local businesses and celebrities with us regular people. One is able to hear Grammy Award winning musicians perform for free at a local restaurant or outdoor pavilion a few times a month. World renown chefs love to participate in local charity events. And just a few days ago, I was having lunch at Duke's with a young friend from church. She had brought me a freshly baked mini-loaf of banana pecan friendship bread. The manager came by, and long story short, Priscilla is "auditioning" her baked goods for the restaurant, and another local restaurant is offering their kitchen for her to do her baking. Too cool huh? Now, Priscilla is naming her new company, getting her business license, and making out her list of baked goods for Duke's and others. By the way, that banana pecan friendship bread? So good that Don and I almost cried over the last bite...

So, we live on this wonderful little island where we can live in a resort and go down to the ocean every night before we go to bed, go worship the Lord every Sunday morning at a park by the ocean, and where our dog - though not with us - has made a new best friend at the lovely kennel/home she is staying at for now - and that friend just happens to be a pig. While it isn't always smooth going, this place never ceases to make me smile.